Bizarrely, this has to be one of the most asked questions I get from people I meet (who haven’t yet seen my work).
“Do you ever get any of those terrible bridezillas?”
It’s funny because we probably all know what that means. It’s bride meets Godzilla – a prehistoric sea monster – so the idea is you become some sort of ‘ferocious monster’ with everything wedding related. Irrational and obsessive demands, etc.
(Although I did think Godzilla was a metaphor for nuclear warfare… but perhaps a nuclear solution is really just the final option when the shouting and outrageous demands don’t get you what you want.)
This isn’t the part where I divulge revealing sea monster stories, sorry. I’ve just not experienced anything like that but I think there is a good reason why.
With my work, I’ve always tried to look deeper than what many people see on the surface. Beyond all the clothes, shoes, decorations, and to and get to the heart of what my clients genuinely care about.
Like the best friend who emigrated but has still always been there for you. Or the the grandparent who can’t be there in person the whole day, but you somehow make an extra effort to spend sometime with him.
The stories that make up the history of your relationships.
You can’t stumble camera first into something as complicated and significant as a wedding… and just make all of this up. For me this has to start right at the beginning – I have to know we’re on the same page philosophically and then I can begin to understand the makeup of what each couple is planning. That way there is mutual trust.
And trust is so important.
I believe it’s the reason I’ve never came across anything even vaguely resembling a prehistoric sea monster, because I take the time to know who I am potentially working for – who and what they care about first. I am never desperate to say “yes” to any passing interest and I firmly believe in saying “no” if I don’t feel I am the right photographer for someone. It’s just the right thing to do.
I speculate that these so-called Bridezillas are in fact just people who do not trust who they’re commissioning.
Distrust seeds anxiety and all sorts of negative thoughts.
If I didn’t feel I could genuinely trust a photographer to capture the most important people in my life and in the most sensitive, artistic way, I too would probably become one of those sea monsters!
So my take away is this: don’t stop your search until you find someone you can truly trust to photograph what’s important to you. That way you’ll be able to relax and dance your way into the early hours without a worry in the world.
“Like many brides, I wanted to make sure I hired the best photographer, so I started my research early and contacted more than 17 photographers in the country. Richard was my 18th contact and my search for the perfect photographer ended there instantly.”
– Mari Warburton, Tokyo/Japan
